PROPOSAL

He finally proposed! It's about time! haha We've talked about getting married by the end of this year after all treatments or when I'm finally cancer free but unfortunately, everything's been happening so fast that he finally decided to just do it! actually, I've been nagging him haha. What's funny is that I got my wedding dress and we got our marriage license before he proposed. lol 

On March 29th, my mom told me that we are doing a final family photo shoot which made a lot of sense. Little did I know, he was going to propose. We headed to the park, I was confuse to why some of my family were running around when I thought they went shopping and I also called him but no answer. Then, I saw up in the air "MARRY ME?", Peter walking towards me while my brother carrying me down the park.

The love of my life finally proposing while playing his song to me "Your Song" by Elton John.

I love this man and he just made me realized how much I want to spend more days, weeks, months and years with him. I still believe in miracles.

GO FUND ME

My bowels are slowly working and I've been taking medications to stimulate bowel movements and shrink the tumours. Before I left the hospital, my oncologist wants me back for chemo. Unfortunately, I don't want to go to that road again. I've tried it and it didn't work. 

My family and I are thinking to go natural like what we wanted at the beginning. Unfortunately, it's not covered by our health care system. I will be doing treatments by a private clinic "Pyatt Health Centre" with Dr Matt, who's been with me throughout my journey since I was diagnosed. He gave me tips and other treatments while I was undergoing chemo. - http://www.pyatthealth.com/ Right now, the treatments are Hypethermia Therapy with IV. I sincerely ask for your donations to help us fund this treatment. Any monetary value is highly appreciated! 

HOME

I was finally discharged today from the hospital. It feels good to be home in my own bed without anyone constantly checking up on me! I will have a palliative team that will be coming home on a daily basis in order to keep an eye on my symptoms. To make sure that I'm in good hands when I finally can't function anymore. We're hoping that I won't be back to the hospital anytime soon. I can enjoy my last few weeks with my loved ones. I'm definitely looking forward to the blessings that's going to happen! best believe, i'm going to leave with a BANG! haha

On the other note, God's been responding to every prayer and miracle. I still believe he's still in control. I'm still fighting and I know he will not give up on me until my last breath. Today, my family and I had such an overwhelming experience, I had a bowel movement! I finally poop! haha This is amazing, that just gives me another week to live! yes, my cancer has spread everywhere to my abdominal but you know what, my twisted intestine is miraculously untwisting itself! I can eat and drink which is the most critical important thing in my life right now and that's all what we wanted but if God is not yet done and wants to heal me more than that, I'll take it!

GOD IS LISTENING

I don't even know where to start. These past couple of days, I've been so overwhelmed by all the support and prayers. I can tell how much God is slowly working in my life right now. I got some good news yesterday, it might be to TMI but my bowel movements (passing gas) are slowly working and that's already a miracle happening! Drs wants me off the NG tube so that I can slowly start drinking liquid slowly but surely. I will most likely be discharge tomorrow or Monday. oh I can't wait! I just cant wait to be home. There are so many things happening for the next couple of weeks and I just can't wait how many more blessings that are about to come. It isn't over yet... the battle isn't over yet! 

ACCEPTANCE

Unfortunately, the Dr that was supposed to give us a second opinion for a possible surgery never showed up. I've expected this but of course, there's that glimpse of hope that my family were holding onto. 

On my end, it took a lot of courage to finally just give up, no i cannot say give up because God knows how hard I fought. I mean, it took a lot of me to finally accept that this is not God's will for me to stay longer and that's totally completely fine with me. I've made my peace with it. 

I look back at my 25 years of living and I've been pretty fucking blessed of how much I've received. It's soooo much more than I could ever ask for. God knows my family and I didn't grow up with a lot but over the years, God gave us so many blessings after blessings. It's so overwhelming!

I got to travel as much as I can although, yes I wish I could've seen more places but you know what, I got to travel in Greece (#1 destination on my bucket list) with an amazing friend! I got to drive my dream car and got to live in a beautiful loving home with my crazy family. I got my family who supported me through everything, who put up a lot of my shit haha. I got to meet my bestfriends who I call my sisters (Akhtari's) and treated me like I'm family as well. I'm so blessed with an amazing friends from so many different places and got to meet many more these past couple of years here in Calgary. Most of all, I got to meet the love of my life! He stayed me with through thick and thin.